CT Scan - Negative

My oncologist just called me (Sunday night at 9:15pm) to let me know that my CT scan came back negative for any metastatic cancer. So that's a relief. It was very nice of him to call so late on a Sunday.

I'm feeling so tired right now - it's probably too late to be writing this but I wanted to give you the results as soon as I got them.

I worked today and could tell I wasn't quite totally at the top of my game. I probably went back to work too soon but thought it would be good for me to get myself dressed and out. Anyway I'm skipping next Sunday since my family's visiting.

I fretted about what clothes to wear and whether to wear the wig or go hatless. The wig won and I also put a gorgeous blue scarf around my neck with each end hanging down, covering both sides of my chest. Aimee told me it looked like a tallis. But it's really a pretty blue scarf with butterflies on it. Sharol gave it to me.

I also wore a silk, cream-colored button-down blouse that I once got when I worked for Glenna selling stuff on e-Bay. Julie and I split a lot of silk blouses one day. Remember those Glenna? Anyway, Stefanie told me that button down blouses with pockets are one of the secret fashions of small-breasted women. So I'm getting into them - especially since it's tough pulling anything over my head with my sore arms.

I stretch my arms every day. It's amazing how your muscles and tendons just tighten up after surgery. It's like your body starts pulling in to protect itself.

I'm going to the surgeon again tomorrow to get the rest of the tape off. Then on Thursday it's on to the radiation oncologist for a "mapping". If I'm all healed up by the following Thursday, I'll start the radiation. Sometimes I feel like I'm never going to be done with all this. I'll never be able to celebrate. I'm going to have to have CT scans every 2 months for the next 2 years. Finishing chemo and surgery were only the beginning of a lifetime of having to deal with this disease in some way or another.

But having a clear scan today is good news and makes me feel that the end could really be in sight...if I keep getting good scans. Maybe I did catch this thing right in the nick of time. Maybe I didn't totally and royally screw up after all. Maybe I really will live to the age of 74 and see Aimee get her first mammogram.