My body is getting stronger and stronger. When I first came home, I could barely get myself up the stairs - my legs were so weak. Now I'm taking walks outside. My colon has completely healed and doesn't act up as long as I keep to a baby-food-like diet.
My head has lots of bald spots and that's been hard. Hair is everywhere. I'm keeping hats on all the time now so I don't get triggered when looking in the mirror or when clumps fall out. Once a day, I brush it all away and then put a hat on. The hats are warm. Yesterday Aimee had me try on the wig and I looked really cute. Then it started itching and I had to take it off. But it cheered me up.
I have 2 more days of antibiotics to deal with. Unfortunately they make me nauseous so getting down food and water has been an ongoing challenge. I'm so ready to be done with nausea!
My next appointment with my oncologist is Tuesday when I get to hear her ideas for continuing chemo but keeping me out of the hospital. I'm really not happy with her after my hospital experience so I'm going to make an appointment with another oncologist as well who Emmy (my friend and acupuncturist) recommended. I'm not doing any more chemo until someone can reassure me I won't be back in the hospital.
This morning Stefanie had planned to take me to Torah class (a class I usually go to at the rabbi's Sunday mornings). I'm just worried about hearing too many details about the tragedy. Being fresh out of the hospital and trying to keep a positive focus has been hard amidst such a thing hitting our community. Tonight there's going to be a Memorial Service held in the Vet's Hall.
If the discussion in class stays on what I think it probably will: good and evil, life and death, why tragedy happens, what's G-d's role, etc., etc., it should be good for my healing.
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