Love Grows Where My Rosemary Goes

Bob gave me a cd with Bobby Sherman singing that old song - "Love grows where my Rosemary goes and nobody knows like me.." Tickles my memories.

So Geoff's dad's home now and things are starting to settle down a bit on that front. Maybe not for his mom, but Geoff seems less stressed. I just really don't want to get nervous about it right now, so I don't ask anything but am open to listening.

Today we went to see my oncologist. He recommended I get a CT scan & bone scan before I start radiation - just to put that question to rest. He said that the radiation will "absolutely" destroy whatever's left in my lymph nodes. But if anything shows up on the CT scan, I may be looking at discussing some more chemo. So I got an appointment tomorrow to get the scan.

I remember the first one I got - seems so long ago now - back in October or early November before the first chemo. I was so nervous. Then after landing in the hospital, I had so many more scans that now that I'm facing one tomorrow, it's like no big deal. Geoff just went out to pick up the yucky stuff I have to drink. So tomorrow's scan is at 3pm. I won't get the results until Monday next week. Bone scan is next Wednesday.

I'm still feeling a bit down and low energy and hoping that the Celexa starts to pick me up soon. Maybe after I hear some good results on the CT scan I'll feel better. Or after I finally get out and see my clients again on Sunday.

My 50th birthday is the 25th and before I was diagnosed, Geoff was talking to me about having a party like we had for him when he turned 50. At the time, I wasn't sure if I wanted to do that. Now I'm still not sure. Am I ready to celebrate the end of chemo and surgery? Maybe I'll feel differently after I get the CT results.

My parents have been wanting to come up to visit and so I told them they could be here for that birthday weekend. They will bring my sister and her daughter with them. If I don't feel up to having a birthday/end of chemo & surgery celebration, well then at least I'll be going out for meals with my parents that weekend.

If I do have a celebration, it will be very low-key and held at our home, like Geoff's was. An open house type deal but I won't cook anything this time - Costco will do the cooking for me. Simple things like chips and dips, fruits and maybe quiches or some other simple to serve eatables. It would be nice to be able to see those of you who have been with me on these carepages all this time. I know some people will be out of town for the Memorial Day weekend, but there are lots of you who live in S. Cruz who I haven't seen since I started all this, but I have felt your support all along. If I do have a party, it will be to give you a hug and if I don't have a party, I know you'll understand why.

Anyway, I'll let you know how my scan went by Monday or Tuesday next week. Hopefully the results will be good and we can all heave a sigh of relief. If not, well, I have two good friends who've lived with metastasis for over 10 years and I will just have to model myself after them. Not to copy Geoff's blog, but I've got to quote another song to end this update: "Look out, here comes tomorrow..." all you Davy Jones valentines.